Assessing Adoptive Parents, Foster Carers and Kinship Carers, Second Edition by Alper Joanne; Howe David; Golding Kim
Author:Alper, Joanne; Howe, David; Golding, Kim
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781784504564
Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers
Published: 2016-12-04T16:00:00+00:00
1.Nine-year-old John, an adopted boy, frequently has rage outbursts in response to routine frustrations and discipline. His adoptive father, Stan, often reacts to John’s rage by screaming himself, along with threats and very punitive consequences. Stan had been raised in a very strict, verbally aggressive manner by his own father. When he hears John’s rage, he often re-experiences his own father’s treatment of him, something that he had never been able to resolve.
2.Twelve-year-old Sarah, an adopted girl, would spend long periods of time by herself in her room, showing little enjoyment of spending time with her adoptive mother, Jennifer. Often, while Sarah was in her room, Jennifer would become sullen and withdrawn, feeling rejected by Sarah as not being a good enough mother. Jennifer’s own mother spent a great deal of time away from the family, and when she was at home, she seldom seemed to enjoy being engaged with Jennifer. As a child, Jennifer felt that she was not a good enough daughter. When that old experience was activated by Sarah’s seemingly rejecting behavior toward her, Jennifer withdrew defensively and was not able even to begin to facilitate Sarah’s desire to spend time with her and to begin to rely on her.
3.Five-year-old Robert was very oppositional to the simplest expectations that his adoptive mother, Mary, would have. As a result, bedtime, mealtimes, bath times and even play times contained many conflicts and resulting frustrations for Mary. The professional told Mary a number of times that Robert’s behavior was due to his developmental trauma, but in the heat of the moment, Mary would still most often react with either anger or withdrawal. Mary was experiencing blocked care because of the repeated failure in her efforts to establish an attuned, reciprocal relationship with Robert. Providing him with care seldom led to any increase in his attachment behaviors. Mary became increasingly reactive to his behavior, with less reflective functioning and emotional regulation.
Thus, we can see that for an adoptive parent to be successful in facilitating her child’s attachment pattern so that it becomes more secure, it is helpful that the parent has an attachment pattern herself that is secure (autonomous). However, at times even when the parent is autonomous herself, her child still has great difficulty forming a secure pattern. This could be the case for months or years. Such a situation places the adoption itself at great risk. For this reason, specialized parenting is often necessary in order to facilitate the development of the adopted child’s attachment pattern.
Assessing a parent’s attachment history and ongoing attachment patterns
In trying to determine whether the parent has attachment patterns that will provide the parent with strengths in raising an adopted child who is presenting pervasive developmental challenges, it is crucial that the professional understands as fully as possible the parent’s own attachment history. Questions about the parent’s history certainly must include whether or not the parent was exposed to traumatic events such as abuse, neglect, parental death, mental illness, substance abuse, domestic violence or repeated moves and separations.
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